If I owned a bed and breakfast I would harness the power of bacon to guarantee success and piles and piles of filthy lucre.
The name of my establishment would be The Bacon Chambers, and obviously the menu would be bacon-centric. But even better than that, instead of the bland mints many ‘fancy’ hotels and inns leave on your pillow, my staff would gently place a strip of after dinner bacon on each guest’s pillow.
The Girl pointed out that this might leave unsightly grease stains on my patrons’ pillows. In order to prevent this inconvenience each strip of after dinner bacon would still be laid on the pillow but in a bacon dish. A bacon dish is very similar to a butter dish, except that it houses bacon in a tidy and respectful manner. You could buy one in the gift shop if you wish.
May I assume the bacon plate would be rectangular and roughly the size of a piece of bacon? Also, in gold-guilded script on the bottom of the plate, would it say, “The Bacon Chambers”? Also, like in fancy hotels, would the towels be two-tone bacon red and have wavy edges like strips of bacon?
Book me a room!
The bacon dish would be all those things, and more. I’m thinking of a variety of models to be sold. For example, could you say no to a bacon dish with your initials emblazoned on it? I think not.
[...] Incidentally, the same day I picked up a cast iron skillet, I also bought a brand new ‘mater knife (except mine has a black handle). I justified the purchase as a combination of my love of ‘maters (and mozzarella) and sharp pointy things. Really, can one have enough tomatoes or knives? Now, once I obtain several bacon dishes for myself and guests, my kitchen will be ready. Some benighted souls might describe a menu of tomato, mozzarella and bacon as ‘limited’ – I call it complete. « Ages of You | [...]